The Annual Epistle of Exaggeration and Outright Falsehoods.

In my ususal procrastinating habit, I have finally composed the annual family holiday letter. I DO write this every year. I just never get around to sending it. I take photos of my ornery kids and make a cute card, and I never mail that either!

Dear Family and Friends:


I sit at the keyboard once again to update you all on the epic experiences of the Roper Family. It was a great year, with many milestones and adventures. First an update on all the family members:


Here's what you expected to hear:


Thing One has graduated from college and is now shopping for a Master's program. She's making six figures at her current job, and is dating four very nice young men (who all have six figure incomes as well) but hasn't decided which marriage proposal she should accept...


Here's what really happened:


Thing One is making great progress in college (she is taking a break, actually, after deciding to change her major and discovering she must start over). She is currently furthering her career at a wonderful company in Orem where she excels at answering the phone and handing out donuts. She quit her second job at the movie theater and is very happy with her "real job." Mommy is sad that she doesn't get to go to free first run movies anymore. With the adoption of our new kitty Asparagus, she has now become a Certified Cat Lady. She continues to sing with Mapleton Chorale, it is her only joy (if she were to start dating, she might have more joy -- any eligible young men you could fling in her general direction would be appreciated).


And more exaggeration:


Thing Two graduated from high school with half of his college credits completed. After agonizing over his many, many options, he finally decided to accept the full ride offer from Yale. His side business doing video capture of Halo gaming has netted him enough funds to retire by the time he is 28.


And some truth:


Thing Two graduated from high school. You probably missed the announcement because I failed to mail it: please find it enclosed with this letter. We were a bit worried that he would not graduate, merely to spite us.  He is still working at the dollar movie theater, and hating it. He wants a "real job" and is spending a little effort to find one. He is busy preparing for his mission by playing Halo until very late in the night and waking up by the crack of noon everyday. I can only figure that this prepares him by getting all the fun and sleeping-in over with so that he's sick of it, and later he will be eager for rising early in the morning for scripture study with a companion. We can only hope. And he went on a date. With a GIRL. To Prom. We are so proud.


On to more falsehoods:


Due to her stellar performance in school, Screamapillar has decided to graduate early and move directly to a modelling career. She has had very generous offers from Vogue and Better Homes and Gardens as a foot model. 


Actually....


Screamapillar has grown tall enough to pass up her older sister (who apparently will remain a midget forever). She's playing many much soccers at the high school, and scoring many much goals. She likes boys, talking on the phone, texting and chatting on Facebook. And crab fishing. And looking beautimous. Since getting her phone for her birthday last March, she has sent 4,782,817 text messages. Yes, she has worn out the keyboard on her phone. She hates housework, her siblings, and housework. She also sings in choir, mostly because there are not enough boys in soccer. She will be turning 16 in three months, and we live in fear.


And what has Luke Skywalker NOT been up to?


Luke Skywalker has excelled in all things sporting. He's playing Varsity first string on Provo High's football team, and averages four goals per game. 


In real life:


Luke Skywalker is 13 and now officially a teenager. He doesn't quite have Thing Two's capacity for sleeping, but give him time, people, give him time. He suffers from extreme shortness. Since his older brother suffered from the same ailment, and has now topped six feet in height, the little boy has hope. He decided it would be in his best interest to skip middle school, and proceed straight to high school, thus opening up new methods of torturing his older sister. He does this just by being there. It causes Screamapillar untold humiliations. He has had a little trouble adjusting to the middle school schedule, sometimes losing track of all the stuff he's got to do. But he's trying hard, and making progress.


And the little one?


Eclair has mastered four languages and has written and published a children's book. She has learned to drive and use a credit card, taking a lot of the pressure off me in running errands.


In real life she's pretty amazing:


Eclair continues to thrive in her big school. She's in fourth grade now and moved up to the "big kids" special ed class, and has a new teacher for the first time since pre-school. She misses her old teacher, but thinks Mr. C is "cool." She is almost at grade level in many subjects, which is big progress for her. She loves to read, and is currently working on doing a project for the science fair. She has lots of really great friends who love her and she is a happy little soul.


Enough now. Here's what really went down this year:


We unfortunately bookended the year with two tragedies. We lost our Grandpa Paul (Hubby's dad) in January, and then lost the tabernacle to fire in December. In between, better stuff happened: we saw the beautiful ice castles at the Zermatt, and had a wonderful vacation to the Logan valley where we camped and go to cheese factory and a demolition derby. We traveled to Ramah for our dear grandpa's funeral and again for a dear cousin's wedding. We watched our kids sing in choir, march in band, play soccer, play in orchestra, act in plays, serve in church, blow things up at the science fair, and do many other amazing things. Our kids are the best.


Hope 2010 was as good for all of you as it was for us.

Sorry about the picture, it's the best we could manage.
.

Christmas Top Ten

Wow. What a great Christmas. Everyone was happy, and there was a minimum of screaming at our house. Completely amazing. So today I prepare for you a list
of the top ten reasons it was SO great:

10.

Santa got to go to bed before midnight for the first time in recorded history.

9.

It was 9am before anyone was awake enough to want to open presents.
So, yeah, the incredible sleeping abilities of teenagers was an advantage for once.

8.

The peoples who live in my house were actually animated and joyful about the presents.
No sullen "whatever"s from the ungrateful sleepy teenagers!
There were smiles! SMILES I say!

7.

Eclair still believes in Santa. And he brought her the greatest desire of her heart:
a diary that locks.
 Because you know how it is with everyone invading the privacy
of a 9 year-old's innermost thoughts.
I read her diary. She made the mistake of entrusting me with the key.
 Today's entry says: "I have nothing to say today."
OOOooo! Now we know all her secrets.

6.

The apple pie I made was horrible but no one complained.

5.

I got a NAP! An actual nap! I think they were so quiet because they had all
overdosed on the chocolate that Santa so kindly left for me this year....
but quiet all the same, so I am grateful.

4.

We stayed home and hosted dinner with some lovely family members we don't see
often enough. So it goes without saying,
 that I was the only one yelling at my kids for a change...

3.

Since I cooked everything that was hot, and lovely Auntie Vee brought
amazing Hawiian rolls and salad, my kid's didn't complain
about potential food poisoning from
certain OTHER aunties who they live in fear of....

2.

There was enough leftover food to ensure
that I won't have to cook anything for quite a while.

1.

SPATULAS! SPATULAS! SPATULAS!

(yeah, I got some wonderful colorful and cool spatulas. I love spatulas. 

You can never have too many. They are awesome.)

Merry Christmas, Everyone!

Merry Christmas from our family. Wishing you and all those you love a wonderful holiday.

Christmas means carnage.

My tree looks so lovely. It has managed to stay decorated this year, unlike last year's "naked tree" experience.

Last year Asparagus the Incredibly Dimwitted Kitty came to live at our house. In bitty-kitty fashion, he tried (with total success) to maim and destroy my tree. He climbed it at every opportunity, knocking down fragile glass ornaments and shattering them. I placed the less breakable ornaments down low, thinking I would be reducing the risk of breakage. Instead, he would lie under the tree shredding these ornaments instead.

I resorted to the internet: Google search "how do I keep my idiot cat out of the Christmas tree." Thank you Internet: a fount of endless stupid ideas. But I have to try something, so here goes:

Option One, Squirt gun. Premise: cat's don't like water and will flee in terror.

This served only to distract Gus momentarily. He couldn't figure out where the water was coming from, discovered that he didn't really care where the water was coming from, and returned to his wholesale destruction of the tree. And unless I wanted to ceaselessly patrol my living room 24/7 until New Year's, I needed a better solution.

Option Two, Cayenne pepper. Premise: spread on the carpet, cat gets it on paws and has to lick it off while grooming, then never returns to the area.

Well it's a good thing that grandma's pug peed on my tree skirt last year and I threw it away so don't have one anymore. I wouldn't want to be putting pepper on the skirt, now, would I? Muffin was annoyed by the pepper, and angry also. But she wasn't the one bothering the tree. Gus never noticed the pepper. And he never groomed himself (this is a long story by itself: ickle kitty was abandoned WAY too young, and had to be taught some valuable survival skills. He has since learned that if he does not bathe himself, there is a hose and cold water in his future...) so this was a complete and dismal failure.

Option Three, Orange peel. Premise: cats don't like citrus, it should repel them.

So, we peeled some oranges and spread the peels under the tree.

Gus ate them.

So we had a naked tree.

This year, he seems to have grown and matured, and doesn't seem quite as interesed in the ornaments and tree.

Thank heaven.

This is a really good thing, because Gus has grown into an enormous tub of lard, and if he attempeted to climb the tree now, it would not be able to bear his immense weight, and I'm certain it would fall over. Maybe we should put him on a diet?

Of orange peels and Cayenne pepper?

.

A Little Broken Piece of my Heart

A small piece of my heart broke yesterday.

I woke up December 17th, 2010 at 6:30 AM. I knew my car had to be scraped and started if I was not going to be driving an iceberg on wheels to work. 6:45, my friend Sarah sends me a text.

"Provo Tabernacle is burning down."

At first, I was trying to see how that statement worked, Sarah's statements sometimes being non-sequiter. Then my stomach begins to sink.

I ran upstairs and turned on KSL--nothing, just the weather. I go back downstairs and wake up mom, telling her I'm not sure, but I just got a text to telling me what happened. We both run upstairs, and now the news has changed to the traffic--focusing on the closing of the main streets around the Tabernacle. It then went to footage of the Tabernacle.


I started choking up.

I finished getting ready for work, and mom got dressed to head down to take pictures. Throughout the day at work, I discussed it with a lot of people, via text, IM and facebook. Mom shared with me the photos she took when she went down.




After work, I briefly drove downtown and could see all the firetrucks, and the pillar of smoke coming out from the ruins. Seeing the roof gone really...kinda started to make it sink in.



I had a concert, Carols and Confections w/ the Maple Mountain High school that night, so after driving through nightmarish construction traffic, I was there. Every time the rental organ played, my mind turned to the Tabernacle back home that was still burning.

On my way home, I battled the construction again, as well as snow. Mom and the kids met me downtown to look a where things stood. I held it together until I saw one of the pillars that held the balcony up standing free, silhoutted through the window. I walked around the building to the south side with mom, which was where I really lost it.

A light fixture in the doorway of the south side entrance. The heating vent right above it, between the stairs that used to lead to the clock tower. I heard part of the south-east tower stairs collapse. I could see through the melted and broken windows to where the organ should have been to the smoky sky. Flames could still be seen through the windows and busted doors.

Our whole community is heartbroken at the loss of not only a religious meeting place...but for the loss of a piece of HISTORY. This is one of the oldest buildings west of the Mississippi. Older than the SLC tabernacle.

I love that building. I have known that building for as long as I can remember. Growing up, our stake conferences were held there, and I have distinct memories of mom hissing at me and my younger siblings to get way from the balcony before we fell and DIED. I remember trying to slide down the banisters. I remember countless concerts over the years. I remember Screamapillar at the age of three singing, "I am a Child of God" with her little friends at stake conference. I remember the first time I heard the organ play during a dress rehearsal for our annual PHS Masterworks concert. I remember another Masterworks concert, performing a positively DISASTEROUS rendition of "Come Thou Fount."

I have so many memories of that wonderful, sacred building, and it breaks my heart to see it like this. And yet...there is still hope.


The miracle is not the fact that the image of Christ in the Second Coming is preserved. It is what it symbolizes. Christ is always there. He will ALWAYS be there for us, despite what fires of the world will try to destroy us. It cannot destroy Him.

Going back again to the ruins tonight, the fires finally extinguished, there is still a sacredness there, even among the ruins of that wonderful building that was dedicated to the Lord. I have felt it, and even in the face of this tragedy, I have found my faith strengthened. While the physical and monetary loss is great, the Spirit of God remains, and will never leave us.

Tomorrow night I will perform in another dedicated building, the Assembly Hall on Temple Square in SLC. I hope that I can share this testimony of faith and never ending spirit with those who come to see us perform.

While I will miss this building, and it hurts, I find comfort in God, and a true phrase I have written in my journal.

"And this, too, shall pass."

I like to think that with God's help, we can make it through and become better in all ways.

--

A picture of mom comforting a woman ended up picked up by the AP, and you can see it on the CBSNews website HERE.

c-c-c-cold. a poem.

early morning chill

it is December

my breath making frosty clouds in the air

as my sweetie and I

thaw our frozen inflexible fingers

by the warmth

of the kitchen stove.

"So.

Do you think

that maybe

we can get a new blower motor for the furnace today?"

Christmas shopping - gift ideas!

I've been slacking lately and not posting as much as I should. I could have something to do with my calendar. It lately has taken to careening wildly out of control. Happens kinda like this every December.

But I thought I might share with you today some gift ideas. For the discriminating shopper.

What's one thing EVERYONE needs?

AN UGLY SWEATER, I SAY.

I picked these out, just for you!

 Our first offerings are for the Disney freak. You know one. You know you do. What better way to punish them that with one of these lovely sweaters?

This just doesn't make any sense. But that iguana is ugly.

Don't forget the boys! They need something exceedingly tacky, too!

 This one is perfect for Christmas. Plastic Rudy there has a nose that REALLY lights up. That'll only be annoying for the first 4000 hours or so. You'll get used to it.

And one for Hubby, to remind him which room he's in charge of cleaning:

AAAAHHHHH!!! RUN AWAY!! RUN AWAY!!!! This one should have been

 posted in October under the heading "HORRORS."

 Did you notice that they are

  ALL AFFORDABLY PRICED  AT JUST TWO DOLLARS!??!

A bargain at twice the price in my opinion.

.

The Mo Tab.

There are a few advantages to living in Utah.

No, not the freezing cold of winter.

Or the blistering heat of summer.

Or the volatile fall and spring where it can be freezing in the morning and blistering in the afternoon.

Really! There are a few advantages!


We have the Mo Tab. Or Mormon Tabernacle Choir. And they are amazing.

Every Sunday morning there is a broadcast of "Music and the Spoken Word" that if FREE to attend. Free, I say! Why haven't you been yet? We totally love to go. Get up super early at 7am on a Sunday morning when we don't have to be at church until 11 am, drive for 45 minutes to Salt Lake City........Okay. We don't love that part. Especially when it's snowing. But we do it anyway because it is not to be missed.

I would go every week if it were manageable. But it's not, so it's easier to make the family go with me if I try for a few times each year. Our most recent trip was.....eventful.

The Christmas concerts are always the best! And most crowded. We would need a good plan: right day, leave very early to get a seat, pack snacks. We decided our date a few weeks in advance, making sure everyone would be available. Unless Hubby had an unscheduled meeting that he wasn't told about until the last minute, which he did.

We woke up to snow.

Tons of snow.

I tried to talk them out of it, the children. But Thing One was determined! She shovelled the walk & driveway, dug out the car, and started it early to warm it up. She cheerfully (and not so cheerfully) poked and prodded everyone into motion. She helped Eclair to dress, combed Luke Skywalker's rebellious hair, and packed little bags of cereal for snacks. There was no getting out of this. We were going, as a family.  And we began the white knuckle trip to SLC.

We had no idea when we departed how bad it would be. The snow flew thicker the further north we went. They call it "lake effect." I call it horrible. It appeared as though the snowplow drivers were on strike. The normally four lane freeway was lost in the frozen wasteland of white. I followed tire tracks of the other brave souls who proceeded me, hoping that I wouldn't be following someone into the median or off the road altogether. All the way there, I kept muttering "we shoulda stayed home.....we shouldn't be out in this.....we are all gonna die." Each time she heard the muttering, Thing One would flash a brilliant smile my direction, reminding me that this was all her fault and I should shoot her when we got home.

The trip normally takes 45 minutes. On this day, it took 75.

We are supposed to be in our seats by 9:10 am. I dropped the kids at the curb at 9:25. "RUN! You might make it! I'll park, and since there's not a chance I will make it in, I'll meet you in the North Visitors' Center after the broadcast!" And I hurried to park in the underground lot.

The underground lot is quite nice. It's not so cold, and there is no snow. For those of you who may live where there is no snow, you may not be aware of how difficult it is to park when it snows. No one can see the lines. So they park....wherever. Which is really freaking annoying. And annonying. Really annoying. I'm very annoyed by it. Really. It is only made worse by well-meaning plow drivers who create these giant snow mounds while they're clearing the lots - usually the mounds will take up 4-6 parking spaces, making it even harder to find a spot. So, yeah, underground is BLISS.

But underground is usually crowded. Because I think everyone else hates street parking as much as I do. This day was not crowded. Hmmm. Unusual for Christmas at the Mo Tab.....I was able to park right by the elevator. I sprinted. Shuffled, really. Because it was slick I tried to be careful, yet quick. I crossed the street against the light and managed to avoid getting cited for jaywalking. I shuffled even faster - the doors were still open! One of the senior missionaries, a man in his seventies, started running toward me "We'll get you in, Sister, take my arm!" They held the door for me, and I climbed the stairs. Where are my kids? Found them quick. Walking quietly to sit by them as they count down "four, three, two" and the broadcast begins.


This video is a different day/year from when we went, but this song was my favorite:


 (I miss Craig Jessop. He's an incredible conductor. He's so exuberant that he once gave himself a nosebleed when he hit himself in the face with his own baton. True story.)

It was great. Some of my absolute favorites, Wilberg arrangements. Spoken word was inspiring. Stupid ungrateful children fell asleep. Or at least dozed a little. But we made it.

I found out why underground was not crowded. Why they held the doors for me. The place was nearly empty, especially compared to normal at Christmastime. Afterward, Bro. Newell got up and thanked everyone for braving the storm to be with them. This is the stuff memories are made of.

Here's the photo:

Sleepy children after an amazing concert.

Can you tell these were taken with my poor cell phone? I wonder what it would have been
 like if I had taken the real camera? Maybe something like this?

Much, much better. Hi, Mack Wilberg!

 Of course now it's two weeks later, and we're not in the Tabernacle, but the Conference Center.

Which is pretty amazing.

I didn't actually go this time, I'm old and I need my sleep.
Screamapillar and Thing One went. 

And it wasn't snowing.

The fountain...

and the lovely waterfall window.

See how lovely it can be? I highly recommend it.

For our sad family trip, we didn't have such great pictures.

And on the way home we stopped at McDonalds to use the bathroom and were accosted by very agressive panhandlers.

But that's another story. For another day. Hopefully one I can forget very soon.
.
.

Present for mom

My OLDER sister (people think I'm older for some insane reason, just making it clear here that she is OLDER than me. OLDER than dirt. Older. Got it? Good. Now don't forget it. I'm younger. SO much younger. I'll never be old.) anyway: my OLDER sister is putting together a present for our wonderful fantastic mother. And she asked me for some pitchers when she was here for Thanksgiving.

Many times.

Many many times.

She called and left messages after she went back home: "Please, when you get a sec, would you email me some pictures?"

and more messages.

and more...

She sent me an email: "Please send pictures!"

And another.

And another.

And she FaceBook message-ed me:
"PLEASE!!!! SEND PICTURES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
(I do not exaggerate. She used many exclamation points. Because I was ignoring her. 'Cause I'm ornery like that.)

Since I'm a photographer and my kids are SO completely over-photographed, you would think this would be an easy task. But because I'm a photographer and I SO completely over-photograph my kids this is a daunting undertaking.

There are literally 14 gabillion photos on my computer.

Daunting, indeed.

So last night after getting ANOTHER Facebook message, I had to stop playing Mall World and get to work.

Here's what I sent my sister (who asked for my best, mind you):

Luke Skywalker at his 6th grade gratuation.

Screamapillar eatin' a snowcone.

Thing Two Easter morning.

Thing One eatin' a s'more in the woodsen.

And I saved the best for last.

My dear, sweet, little Eclair.

Don't I have lovely adorable offspring? I'll bet everyone out there reading this envies me and my perfectly photogenic children.

.

Easier than it looks

A few years ago at a craft fair I saw the most amazing thing.

So I bought it. It was so shiny and beautiful!!!

And now I have attempted to make my own.

They aren't as perfect as the one I bought, but I did my best.

Look! There's me! My reflection in the shiny silver ball! Hi, Me!

I bought the 12 pack of glass bulbs at the dollar store, for (surprise!) a buck. The paint and other materials I already had on hand. I just used regular white craft paint, which was fine even for the silver ball. You could use whatever color you want (but I like white, be a sheep - use white). I only took off the lid and used the paint that was on the inside of the lid. Very little paint required. And no messy cleanup if you follow my example.

Here's the trick:

No paintbrushes needed. Just a pencil eraser with a straight pin stuck in. If you can't manage to stick the pin in the eraser without drawing blood, walk away now. I'll make one for you and you can pick it up at my house. The green ball was my practice ball, it took a bit of time to perfect the technique. If you make a mistake, just wipe it off quickly with a wet paper towel.

Remove the hanger from the bulb, and slip it over a pencil. Wipe it down with a clean cloth to remove your grubby fingerprints. Then do yer painting, and put the pencil into a cup to dry. Easy as pie.

See? Any idiot can do this. I did.

The real skill is in not getting paint on your clothes because you're a klutz (me) and trying to come up with a suitable design that doesn't suck. YOU CAN DO IT!!! I KNOW YOU CAN!!!

Go forth, and paint.

Daily List

Every day I make up a list of stuff I gotta do. I've been doing it since the dawn of time. I love to cross things off, even if they are stupid things like "drive to work" because then I feel like I might have actually accomplished something today.

I'd like to share with you the most recent items that really need to get done, but never quite get off the list:


Finish hanging Christmas lights. I LOVE having a billion lights up. During the 2002 Olympics we lit up the house and yard with a ton of red white and blue lights that we kept up thru the the end of February. With Screamapillar's help, there are currently 600 LED bulbs lighting up the front bushes. And man are they bright. I still have approximately 659 more strings of lights I would like to hang. There is a neighborhood lighting contest on the 16th. Thing Two begged his father to leave me in the dark (ha!) about this, but word got out. I just need to sort through all the lights, figure out which ones are busted beyond repair, then hang them before the temperatures drop below freezing again. Maybe this year I'll actually throw away the busted lights so I don't have to sort through them again next year...

Retake the family photo for the annual Christmas card. Eclair was having a meltdown during the original shoot, and looks like she had been crying. Because she was. Desperately needs a re-do. Everyone looks lame. And then I need to compose the Annual Epistle of Exaggeration and Outright Falsehoods. And then fail to mail it.

Remove the gelatinous pumpkins from the front porch. These are not Halloween ones, just the uncarved punkins from Thanksgiving that I keep meaning to remove to the garden so they may fulfill the measure of their creation and make more pumpkins for next year. One of them looks like a puddle now. Frankly, I've let this go so long that I am now afraid to move them.

Anybody wanna come over and help?

.

Tis the season

December. The beginning of the madness. SO MUCH BUSY-NESS!!!!!

Shopping.


Decorating.


Cooking.


Crafts.


Recitals & performances & events.


Family gatherings.


and one other item......


Shopping: for some the madness began last week with Black Friday. Which I swore I would not participate in. You shouldn't swear. It's bad. And it doesn't help much. Especially when your oldest daughter talks you into participating in Black Friday. She was at the shops at 3am. I accidentally slept in until 10:30. And then she carted me hither and yon until 10:30 pm. I got some amazing deals, and so the shopping is almost done and I have lived to tell about it.

Decorating? Well, most of the stuff   never got put away  last year, so I guess I'm nearly done! Just getting the tree up and decorated, with an anti-cat program in place. Last year Gus was a cute little kitten and climbed the tree daily. He broke nearly EVERY glass ornament on the tree. This year he has lost the cuteness factor, and I have sworn (there I go again) to KILL him if he does it again. I have a little tiny pair of shackles with his name on them...

Cooking. Always looking for an excuse to make some good stuff. I won't mind cooking one bit. Bring on the butter.

Crafts! Crafts!!!!! I have 14 billion ideas I want to do!!!! Will they ever be completed? With my track record, probably not. But I will make a valiant effort. And I will blog them for you. I will show you how to make a little tiny cowboy hat ornament out of a styrofoam cup.....magical!

As for recitals, performances, and events:  Screamapillar is performing today at Temple Square in Salt Lake City with her choir. And she sings again Friday at the Christmas party at the church, and another choir performance twice on Saturday. I'm sure there are a dozen other performances that she hasn't told me about yet.

Thing One sings with Mapleton Chorale. They are performing at the Covey Center today and Thursday, and then only a half dozen other performances, one of which might not cost me $12 to attend. She also will be singing at Temple Square. Apparently, if you sing in a choir it is required by law that you sing at Temple Square at Christmas.

Thing Two is a slacker. His sax is gathering dust. He no longer has a band to call his own and there will be no Temple Square for him. So sad. Instead he will (as the only partially sane member of the family) boycott all band and choir performances in favor of playing Halo with people he has never met who haven't made his life unbearable like the miserable beings he is forced to live with.

Luke Skywalker is in a band. A very lame 7th grader band. Have you ever been to a 7th grad band concert? I dare you to label them anything but lame. If you are invited to one, make sure you have a backup plan with something you'd like to do better. Like having a root canal. It's all part of being in 7th grade. I assume that he has a Christmas concert at some point. He keeps telling me every morning "I'll ask my teacher," which is followed up after school by "I forgot." I wonder if we will ever know....

Eclair plays piano. Incessantly. You may drop by at anytime, because we are currently living in a perpetual state of "Christmas Recital." In fact, when Luke Skywalker was downstairs in his room practicing "Silent Night" on his clarinet, Ecliar started accompanying him from the living room. This ended in fisticuffs, as Luke Skywalker (new to clarinet after abandoning the violin) assumed he was being mocked.

Ah, harmony. Ain't is a beautiful thing?

Almost as great as Family Gatherings. It's especially fun in my family. Eveyone comes here to visit, and I'm expected to put my life on hold and follow my extended family's schedule (even if they don't). My sister invests loads of time creating the schedule. It is sent out a month in advance and I am warned that I had better be available for every event. So if the schedule says "Sledding" on Wednesday, I should not prepare my children for sledding. I should be ready instead for a movie, shopping, or perhaps some other activity that pops into my sister's head. Sledding will have happened the day before and I missed it because someone forgot to tell me that they modified the schedule.

She can't really be blamed for it, though. ADD runs rampant through my entire family. We are ALL very impuse driven. We have good intentions, thus the attempts at a schedule. We just have a real failure to follow through. Which makes for a lot of spur of the moment fun.


Now don't forget my "one other item."  The Annual Epistle of Exaggeration and Outright Falsehoods. I have to write it. When I do, I will share it with you. As you know me so well, I am sure you will be able to sort fact from fiction.

Stay tuned.
.