Friday, September 30, 2011

Hoppy Brid-day!

Once upon a time I had the cutest baby in the world. We named her Thing One.

See? Cutest baby in the world.

Then one day she freaking grew up overnight when I wasn't looking.

It just isn't fair.

Happy Birthday, little one.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

A bright spot in the darkness

Please excuse my recent absence from blogging, it seems that many of life's crisises have gotten in the way recently. Too much time away from home and my computer, mostly.

One of our recent "events" involves my wonderful Hubby. Have you ever had that one friend? The one who you have an instant rapport with, the one who shares your passions and who you love to share your work with? Hubby has such a friend, and they are like two peas in a pod. They have more in common than even they know, and his wife and I have sniggered behind their backs for years because they don't even realize how alike they are. They even share the same first name, and we share a wedding anniversary as well.

They consult with each other a lot in their writing, and Jamie's Matt is preparing to publish two books in the near future, to make his ninth and tenth publications. They're constantly bouncing ideas off each other, and when the four of us are together, Jamie & I manage to find plenty of our own to talk about. She's also a talented stylist, and any good hair day I have is her fault. Our boys have a deep and abiding love for church history, and seriously know their stuff. The energy they generate when they are brainstorming is palpable. You may have seen some of Jamie's Matt's books:

Well, Jamie's Matt has taken a sabbatical of sorts.....if you could call it that. The experiences my Hubby and I have had with the two of them in the past week have been humbling. To watch her keep vigil at his bedside with such strength and courage is inspiring. It has been my privilege to hold her hand and hug her tight as Midgely anointed his head with oil, and my husband gave hers a priesthood blessing. I only hope that I have been a support to her during this difficult time, and I ask for your support as well: pray for Jamie and her Matt, please.

But in the darkness of these tense hours and days as we wait for Jamie's Matt to awaken, there are some bright spots. We find much to laugh about and have really enjoyed the time we have had together. Hubby keeps telling me "Tell her that story about...." and I have to remind him that we have our own independent friendship, apart from our Matts. She is my hairdresser, after all, and women tell their hairdresser EVERYTHING. 

I'll share with you now a story I shared with her yesterday: At five am I took Eclair with me to drive my parents to the airport for a vacation. We spent the night at my folk's house to save some time in the morning since we had to be up so early. It was still pitch black outside when we packed up their bags and drove to Salt Lake to the airport. We took a "shortcut" across the mountains because of all the road construction on the freeway, and the inevitable delays that would cause. As we came over the peak from Highland into Draper, laid out before us was the landscape of the Salt Lake Valley, all lit up in the darkness. A small voice chirped from the back seat:

"Ooohh. It looks just like Las Vegas!"

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Treachery in the tub.

Once upon a time this morning, I stepped into the shower.

And discovered that someone had laid a trap for me.

My feet slipped out from under me, and I narrowly regained my balance before taking a nasty spill. What the heck? Here are my clues: the faint aroma of green apple, a light green color covering the entire bottom of the bathtub, the empty (new last week) bottle of conditioner, and my recollection that Eclair had an unsupervised shower last evening.

She came to me dripping wet, wrapped in a towel, to explain to me why this unsolicited shower was necessary.

"At school today, Jennifer sneezed. On my desk. I could even see the germs, Mom! They were all over my desk. So I though I had better make sure I was clean so I don't get sick. Do you think I'm clean now?"

Who can argue with that?

I tucked a small bottle of hand sanitizer into her backpack just in case.

Sunday, September 11, 2011


Words are hard today. Just recalling this day ten years ago brings tears to my eyes.

I had just given birth to Eclair, and my sister called and woke me up to tell me "turn on the tv."

I never, in my wildest dreams, could have imagined what I would see that morning.

My brother worked in the city. I spent the entire day trying unsuccessfully to reach him by phone. I finally reached his wife, and she told me he was out of town, and safe. Not so for his friends and colleagues. They didn't make it out.

So many didn't make it out.

This day changed the world forever. Strangely enough, there has been good that has resulted from that day. It brought us back to the realities of life, what is really important, and what really matters.

Spend a few moments watching this video. May it give you hope.

Never forget.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

The Last Words of My Mother's Sanity

Karen here. I am here to regretfully inform you all that the last bit of my mother's remaining sanity has died. At 10:05 PM, after an extremely emotionally taxing day, which in turn had followed weeks of sleep deprivation and ridiculously (and even MORE emotionally taxing) busy days, it went went down with a fight...or at least, a few memorable last words.

(we are sitting quietly in the living room. Suddenly, mom speaks.)

Mom: "I need doctor pepper to make it through the night."
Me: "You know maybe you should try this novel idea called 'sleep.' Its where you actually lapse into this thing called unconsciousness."
Mom: "I tried that, and then this fly tries to land on my face. And then I wake up doing ninja crap."

(some laughs from Screamapillar and myself, then mom continues.)

"Seriously, and then I'll be like OUT of the chair going, 'Aaaaahhhh flyyyyy!' But then I got it later. I smacked with magazine and ended its life. A rolled up magazine is an excellent ninja tool. Better than nun-chucks cuz then you don't hurt yourself. *a moment's pause* also excellent for smacking unruly teenagers."

(at this point, I have shared this via chat with my online Stalkee, who is very amused and declares that she is going to move in with us.)

Mom: "I'm cool. She gets to do the dishes."

(Stalkee says that she like doing the dishes, but sometimes has problems with an allergic reaction to the soap.)

"She can use any soap she wants. She could even use the DISHWASHER, which people in this house haven't figured out yet. They just put stuff in there and never take it out again."

(Mom then proceeds to offer her some "really keen rubber gloves and [her] own apron.")

Mom: "It would be awesome apron. With gold lame´ and pom-poms. Maybe some rhinestones..."

Stalkee: I am excited for the pimped out apron and my gangsta gloves.

(Mom goes quiet for a minute, and has suddenly developed a completely blank, phased out look on her face. I comment on it.) 

Mom: "I'm staring at the spot between the telescope and the window. Because if I look anywhere else, I will feel obligated to clean something. So I look somewhere that's already clean. And then I don't have to do anything. The celing is generally a safe place too look…except when there's spiders…. *pause* And tape, left over from streamers from a a party."

(Stalkee then inquires if she shall receive a Swiffer to go with her pimped apron and gangsta gloves.)

Mom: "Tell her we have a vacuumable Swiffer that attaches to the vacuum. It's yellow and she may call it Swiffer if she wants to. And we'll have a fashion show."

(goes quiet for another minute) 

Mom: "I have a deep abiding desire for Dr Pepper…I also have equally ardent amount of ennui."

(Screamapillar then asks for a story.) 

Mom: "You need a bed time story? So you'll go to bed? Once upon a time there was this little girl and she was really frikking annoying so her brother and sister taught her to say "I'm so annoying," and then that was even more annoying and they regretted that they ever taught her such a thing." Note: this is a true story that Thing 2 and I taught Screamapillar to do as a baby.
Screamapillar: "You've lost it."

Mom: "No! *is determined and very intense* I found it!"

*dramataic pause*

"But I'm not sure what it is."

 Finally, we shall end with this:

"This is all going on the blog, you know."

"There is no blog. only Zuul.


Friday, September 2, 2011

My evil kids....

My kid are evil. Don't know if I mentioned that before, but thought I had better tell you before you find out on your own.

Tonite, Hubby and I took Eclair and Luke Skywalker to a Ward Campout. I got to judge the "talent" show, and we got to visit and have a good time. We had no intention of staying the night, though. I value my sleep a little too much at the present moment.
Screamapillar was gone to a sweet 16 party for her friend, and Thing Two was out with a friend doing back-breaking labor for hire. Thing One? Well, she's had kinda a bad week, so we left her to her own devices. We figured she'd go out with Boyfriend and have a good time.

When we came home from our activity at 10 pm, we found this note, stuck with duct tape to the front door:

The really sad part is that Hubby only read the red letters. Then his brain went into some kinda overload and he just stood there in shock fer a minute or two......


Every stinkin' one of them.

Especially Thing One.