Who are these children and why are they calling me "Mom?"

I am blessed to be Mom to many children who I didn't have the "blessing" of giving birth to. Many young peoples (friends of my young peoples) like to come to my house and eat. I LOVE to feed them. And pester them as if I were their real mother.....

This post today is for my dear DAYNA who is living and working at Lake Powell this summer and is not able to drop in at a moment's notice and say "Got any Muddy Buddies?"

Because you have chosen to live and work in the depths of fiery hell this summer (I've been to Lake Powell before, for someone with my autoimmune disorder, it is nothing but hell), I am unable to send these in a care package. They would completely dissolve in the heat. And you would be sad. We can't have that!! So here is Mommy's Special Muddy Buddies Recipe. If you want the commercial version from CHEX, click here. If you want the best version ever, keep reading.

You'll need:
1 14 oz. box Western Family Corn Squares (about 9 cups)
1 cup milk chocolate chips
1/2 cup creamy peanut butter
1/4 cup margarine
1-2 cups powdered sugar

Pour your cereal out into a large mixing bowl, you'll need space for mixing. On very low heat melt the margarine, then add chocolate chips, and stir until combined. When all the chips are melted, add the peanut butter and continue mixing. If the heat is too high it will be thick and lumpy. If you add vanilla extract like in that other recipe it will be thick and lumpy. Thick and lumpy is BAD. Very bad. As soon as it is creamy, pour slowly over the cereal, stirring to coat evenly. This is where I'm all OCD and make sure every piece is evenly coated. It ain't pretty, just don't come in the kitchen until I am done with this part. I use a rubber scraper for this because I am such a complete control freak about my muddy buddies. Get every inch of that chocolaty sauce out of the pan, it must not go to waste! Instead, it goes to my waist. After this part is done, add powdered sugar 1/4 cup at a time, keep stirring until it looks like it needs more. And more. And more. At some point the chocolate stops absorbing the powdered sugar and they start to look a little white. You can stop with the powdered sugar at this point, unless you want more. Hey, knock yourself out with the powdered sugar, why don't ya.

End result = yummy.

Go make some, Dayna. And don't forget to turn off the stove.
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(posted here to share)

Mission Control

Here's some more "before and after" for ya:

This is Mission Control for our house.
BIG GIANT CALENDAR because we just aren't normal people, we need a bigger calender to cram our many activities into. The rule is, "If it's not on the calendar, it doesn't exist & nobody goes."
Bell schedule for the high school (so I can text them between classes and/or know if they are in class while texting me so I can text back "don't *&^%$#@ text me while you're in class").
HS Soccer schedule so I know where the heck I am going this week to yell my head off cheering a game that after seven years I still know nothing about (Go my favorite sports team, go! Score another goal basket unit!).
Elementary schedule because those people just take the most freaking random days off and you never know until it's too late to plan something fun that: the little ones are going to be home today......
Phone list and an assortment of notes with random phone numbers written by small children that might reach the Dali Llama or Barry Manilow.
Stuff I would like to hang nicely someday, but they are here on random nails so they won't get broken.

Guess what? School is out so I threw away all the schedules (liberation!). Here's the new and improved Mission Control:

Still has Barry Manilow's phone number, though, in case Eclair wants to go over there to play.

Here's the part that may need some more explaining. As part of the new "anti-boredom summer device" I have created a detailed list of what has to be done before the job is complete. Why, yes, I am an OCD Type A Control Freak, why do you ask?
Yes, the downstairs bathroom is a dungeon. Only Thing Two is brave enough to use it. Desperately needs a makeover, but not until I have an extra $2000 kicking around.

These are actual photos of my actual house. In it's natural state (which in scientific terms would be called "a big heinous mess"). Just trying to keep it real here, folks, it's nothin' you ain't already seen.

Did you notice the giant trash can in the dining room? Yeah, the one with wheels on. I love this trash can. It's like the Energizer Bunny: it just keeps going and going. I can throw away all the crap left behind by children all day long. It doesn't fill up too fast, and I can keep throwing things away for hours. Take it everywhere with me when I'm cleaning. I even got a whole doll house in there once (don't tell Eclair, she thinks the dog ate it). Did I mention that I love this trash can? It's my bestest friend in the whole world.

Man, I need to get out more if the trash can is my best friend....
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Before....

Here are the "before" photos of the current projects:

Desk organizer, DI, $1.00
shows potential.....

Gaudy gold mirror from grandma's house, free:

Again, potential, I love mirrors.

Set of four sturdy and lovely chairs, DI, $35 for all:

I am totally in love with these chairs. I wish you could fully appreciate how disgusting the seat covers are though. Any suggestions for replacement fabric? Maybe zebra stripe? Care Bears? I do have both.

Table with leaf, DI, $40:

Pretty bad surface, but sturdy in construction. Turned legs a monster to sand for refinishing. But, we desperately need a bigger table instead of using the small table and the bar for family meals. Wouldn't it be lovely if the ugly pine table could match the lovely mahogany chairs?

Stay tuned......

And by the way, those photos of the table and chairs reveal a new project that really needs to happen: Ugly Deck Makeover......
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The newest "Anti-Boredom Device" for summer.

Yeah, if I were a normal person, I'd call it a chore chart.

But I'm not, and if you didn't know that already, you might as well click "next blog" now.

I see so many cute things on other people's blogs, and I think to myself, "Self, you're a moderately intelligent human being (at times), you could make that!" And I saw a cute idea for a chore chart. Cute little tile magnets, cute printed paper, And it looked like the glue-gun-impaired part of me might be able to manage it. Until I started pricing out all the parts & pieces required to make it.

Yeah, right.

We'll get right on that one, $45 chore chart.

The reason I need a chore chart is because I have five children. And because I have five children, I can't afford a $45 chore chart. If I had $45 sitting around un-earmarked to fees & expenses, I'd be sitting at Cold Stone eating "German Chocolate Cake" right now. Forty five dollars worth of "German Chocolate Cake" mind you.

So I have improvised. What will a magnet stick to other than a $12 sheet of galvanized steel custom cut to fit your pretty little specialty item $8 router-cut board?

A COOKIE SHEET. You know, I think I just might have 47 million of those.

And do I need to order my little glass tiles from Etsy at $10 for ten tiles, plus shipping? Wait! Got 30 at Lowe's for $2.24 (cool clear sea glass with little bubbles!!!!). I could have got the $.84 clearance ones, because we all know what a big spender I am, but those weren't as cute as these. They were ugly for all their budgetary cheapness, and I have standards, you know!

(PHOTO OF TILES HAS MYSTERIOUSLY DISAPPEARED....)

And those really strong earth magnets, those you gotta have (as I have learned because my Scrabble magnets are always falling off the fridge after being played with by little people who live in or visit my house). Etsy again at about the same price as the craft store, but I'd have to order 100 of them. Hmmmm..... maybe I should reconsider that one, I could make more chores with 100 magnets!!!!! But I'd have to pay for shipping the heavy things, and then I couldn't use the 40% off coupon. Craft store wins this time.

Scrapbook paper backgrounds for each person's assignments. Yeah, right again. I'm a freakin' photographer, right? So let's print some photos instead of using scrapbook paper! Then no one can say "I didn't know which chores were mine!" Lets pick really embarrassing photos: Thing One wearing the "Bridesmaid from the Black Lagoon" dress, for example. The dress with the slug sleeves. Yeah. This is getting better and better!!!!Here's the step by step on how this amazing feat was accomplished:

1. Cookie sheet is ugly. Scrub with steel wool. For what seems like hours. Still ugly. Use Modge Podge to cover ugliness with sheet of white tissue paper. Moderately better.

2. Size photos of children and print to fit back of cookie sheet so it looks like there was SOME thought and effort that went into this..... dimensions for mine called for 5x5 photo prints, made in PhotoShop Elements.

3. Print photos trying not to think of how color printer ink costs more per ounce than gold. Cut out and Modge Podge to back of cookie sheet.

4. Create list and find matching pictures for chore tiles. Look for really difficult jobs for the kids that annoy you, and easy ones for your favorite child (Quit denying it, everyone has a favorite).

5. Print to fit tiles (mine were 1", so pics a bit smaller) trying once again not to think of how color printer ink costs more than gold. Mod Podge to tiles and allow to dry.

6. Using SUPER AMAZING E6000 glue, VERY CAREFULLY glue the magnets to the back of the tiles. Don't put them too close to each other or they will pull each other's magnets off. Seriously. And don't get in the way if the magnets decide to fly toward their apparent life partner 12 inches away -- or thanks to E6000 glue, YOU will be the magnet's life partner.

7. Nail your finished project to the wall and proclaim for all to hear: "HERE ARE YOUR CHORES! DO THEM OR DIE!!!!!!"
8. Giggle and laugh with your husband at the childrens plight while coming up with amusing titles for the "Chore Chart." Like, "Activities Options List" and "Servitude Scheduling" or, as I have titled this post "Anti-Boredom Device."

And here is the finished product for your consideration.
(Note the extra "Brownie Points" for insane people who might be looking for more work to do.)

Now go make a servitude schedule for your own children, before they start to think that you love them or something.
(update on this post).
linking to:
http://www.domestically-speaking.com/
http://www.bluecricketdesign.net/
http://decormamma.blogspot.com/
http://bec4-beyondthepicketfence.blogspot.com/2010/06/under-100-linky-party_09.html
http://www.creationsbykara.com/2010/06/915.html
http://j-a-girl.blogspot.com/2010/06/show-and-share-day_16.html
http://nikkisniftyknacks.blogspot.com/2010/06/gettin-crafty-on-hump-day_15.html

1000 VISITS!!!

Lookie at the little counter at the bottom! We've had 1000 VISITS!!!


Most of them were me looking for typos......lets subtract my clicks:



Lookie! We've had 11 visits!!!


And here's a snapshot to celebrate:

This lovely blurry photo taken as the sun was going down is Middle Daughter (#13) kicking some girl in the shins. She's amazing. At kicking people in the shins, I mean.

And she's pretty good at soccer too.

She's coming home today. It has been quiet without her. The boys have no one to fight with but themselves, and that's no fun. Everyone know that tormenting a sister has 10X the value of pestering a brother.

Right?
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Photo and Quote of the Day...

"Never, never, never grow up."
Winston Churchill


Oh.

Wait.



Got that one wrong.



It's GIVE UP not GROW UP.

Okay, so never give up on not growing up. Okay?

This message brought to you today by:
Princesses in Sombreros Anonymous.
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Top Ten Things to do for SUMMER VACATION!!!

So, today is the official first day of summer. Friday doesn't count because the elementary school kids still had to go to school even though the high school ones didn't. And apparently, Memorial Day (yesterday) doesn't count because it was a holiday and there wouldn't have been school anyway.

So, here it is. My list of the top ten things we should do as a family for SUMMER VACATION!!!!!!

10. Boys: get caught up on all the scouting stuff.
9. Go camping
8. Take a trip, maybe to California to visit my sister.
7. Spend time working in the garden & grow some good stuff to eat.
6. Remodel the family room (an ongoing project to make a difficult space work).
5. Get the house clean!!!! Make some major donations to DI and downsize.
4. Spend more time serving others -- get out and do something in the community.
3. See more movies together (maybe at the theater and not always the Red Box).
2. Plan some great day trips & spend time with the whole family.
1. Go camping again (I love camping).




Alas, I doubt my top ten list will go far.

Behold the children's top ten list:

10. Play X-box & PlayStation.
9. Play on the computer all day.
8. Watch tv all day long in our pajamas striving to forget anything we learned in school last year.
7. Sleep in until the crack of noon.
6. Stay up late doing relatively nothing.
5. Play night games.
4. Eat in every room (even the off limits ones) and leave dirty dishes behind.
3. Do absolutely no chores whatsoever.
2. Lie around proclaiming our boredom to the world.
1. Stay up late (see #6) so we can sleep in (see #7).


Lofty goals, indeed.

Who will win?
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