E: Mama, there's a spider in the bathroom and I'm scared (says the girl who 6 months ago thought spiders were her best friends)
M: It's okay, you're brave, you can smash him. When we lived in the old house, there were lots of spiders, and your brothers & sisters just learned to get a shoe and smash them.
E: (weeping copiously and throwing her arms about my neck) BUT I'M SCARED!!!
M: How about we get a shoe, and I will go with you. You're brave. You can do it!
(We get a shoe, and go to the bathroom.)
E: It's right there, mama, on the other side of the toilet
(Mama looks and doesn't see spider. THEN Mama sees spider. It's the size of a cocker spaniel. Actually, about the size of a Sacajawea dollar.)
M: Oh. There. It. Is. It's okay, honey. Mama will get this one........
(Mama smashes spider. A lot. Many times. Then flushes spider.)
E: Thanks Mama. I thought it was gonna give me a heart attack. Am I old enough to have a heart attack?
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